Saturday, November 14, 2009

Surreal

My sister is getting married one week from today.

I'm trying to visualize my mother, my father, my stepmom, my brother and a church full of well-wishers, gazing at my only sister as she walks down the aisle and commits to sharing her life with Alec. The whole experience - all the family converging onto Columbus, Indiana for a weekend of festivities - feels so enchanting and so sweet - that I can't wrap my brain around the enormous amount of happiness that I'm feeling for her.

I was driving this afternoon and thinking of how much she means to me. My heart started to hurt, just a little, as I thought about how marriage can be so happy and a little sad, at the same time. My little sister, who is mostly wiser than me - her older sister - is about to be set free from the clutches of my parents, and me. She'll have a new family to blend into - which I'm sure she'll do quite well - and new traditions to start with Alec.

Misty-eyed, I pulled the car over to let the tears flow. Just for a few moments. And then I let myself feel the wonder of romantic love - and the joy of getting to fly across the country to see that love manifest before my eyes.

I was reminded of another life event; one that involved my sister, driving in HER car. When I found out I was pregnant, I called her first. She was driving and I told her my news. I heard the sob before I heard any words. She later told me that after we had finished our conversation, she pulled her own car over and cried.

My sister makes me feel tender-hearted in a way that no one else can. The connection, the bond that we have is unlike any that I have with anyone else. She shares my history, she shares my genetics, she shares a piece of my soul.

Even as I write this, I can feel the tears brimming. My sister is stronger than she'll ever know - she endured a career as a commercial airline pilot and spent long, dark days (and nights) wondering when things would shift in her life. I know that she questioned fate, on more than one instance, and the possibility of love in her life.

And now it's here. Everything that she waited for and so much more.

I might as well come to terms with the fact that I'm gonna spend the next six days in a heightened emotional state with a few unexpected tears here and there.

My sister's getting married.
My sister's getting married.
My sister's getting married.

She deserves happiness that can't be quantified, love that can't be measured and every single blessing in the world.

In the words of our beloved Dr. Seuss, whom I'll be quoting at the reception:

Today is your day!
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!
You can steer yourself, any direction you choose.
You're on your own and you know what to do.
(This is likely where the klee-nex will come out!)
And you are the couple who'll decide where to go
And when things start to happen, don't worry. Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too.
Oh! The places you'll go!
You'll be on your way up.
You'll be seeing great sights.
You'll join the high fliers
Who soar to great heights.
Wherever you fly, you'll be best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.
So be sure when you step
Step with great care and great tact
And remember that Life's a great balancing act.
And will you succeed?
Yes! You will indeed!
Kids, you'll move mountains.
You're off to great places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!!!

I love you, Alisa.

4 comments:

  1. Jan, I've read & reread this and can't stop crying; thank you!
    I love you. Thank you for this, and for sharing my future and past with me.

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  2. My sister breaks my heart and warms it all at once. How is that possible?

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  3. Lovely Janeen.
    Congrats to Alisa and Best Wishes for a Happily Ever After!

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