Friday, June 25, 2010

Intention

I'm all about intentions at this point in my life. I have a lot of them.

The thing about intentions is that you can't let them swirl about. A good intention should have a place, a home, some careful consideration. Maybe some nurturing, too.

Lately, I'm finding that I'm looking at my intentions ever so carefully. And when I put them "out there" - as it's so popular to say - I'm scrutinizing what comes back to me.

It's been a little weird. I can't possibly ignore this: I'm bombarded in one area.

There's a trip to New York - all expenses paid - in an amazing, 3 bedroom TriBeca loft.

There's an adorable guy in Southern California. All I know is that his name is Ray and he's probably going to be my Facebook friend soon. No, he's not an online hook-up.

There's a Midwest rendezvous with someone I hardly know, but he's someone I'd very much like to know better.

Curious?

ME TOO.

I spent the day mulling over these possibilities in my head. And meanwhile:

Text notification beeped: "Please come to NY! I'll pay for you to fly home early. Please just say you'll come!"

My client arrived: "Look at these pictures! He's the nicest guy ever! And he wants to meet you."

I sent an email: "Rendezvous? Really? Is this a good idea?"

So while the details of all the above take flight in their ever-constant dance of "yes, no, maybe, i-don't-know," I've found it best to leave that situation alone (and it is only a situation right now; absolutely no intent has been formed) and move on to something I can really wrap my heart around.

Work.
Passion.
Writing.

It's been on my brain for way too long. This writing life that I have is superb, but it needs to be more. There's a voice, there's a beckoning: "Janeen, wake up and write." And I can't ignore it any longer.

So I chased down the intention this week. I grabbed it by its unruly neck and I pulled it in. I held it close and I asked it for clarity. I asked it for feedback. I asked if for manifestation.

And it appeared.

Freelance.

I put out some calls, sent off an email. Asked God, the Universe, the Intention Master to speak. Guide me. Direct me. Show me.

Tonight, in my Inbox, there it was. A reply email from the owner of a freelance journalism firm.

He asked: "Fitness, travel, food, wellness?"

YES, YES, YES, and YES!

He went on: "Long features or short?"

YES and YES, PLEASE!

We are going to talk next week.

I'm learning how to play the game of Intentions. I'm learning more every day. I'm starting to think that I might even play so well that I may begin to win. Somehow, keeping that mindset helps me to believe that as exciting as NYC might be, as nice as a new Facebook friend could be, or as amazing as a Midwest meet-up would be, none may even occur.

It's all about intention, right? And maybe, just maybe, none of those are intended for me.

But the phone interview next week? That's all mine!

1 comment:

  1. wow. good for you, janeen. you can do ANYTHING you put your heart into. time to stop looking out, and look IN.

    you are beautiful.

    ReplyDelete